SHE WAITED . . .

These are some of the earliest photos that we have of our daughter Sarah Joy Smedley who will come home to us soon from Guangzhou, China.  When I think of all those "lost years", I get a little melancholy, just like any other mom who adopts children at an older age. Think of all those thousands of moments when you respond to your baby's cries that Sarah Joy did not experience. I think the human spirit is marvelous to survive all that loss. Fortunately, Sarah Joy (and Lizzy Grace, home 3 years) come from a loving orphanage and were cared for by nannies who really love them, but it is still not the same as being in a family!

 These two were taken in October 2016, after the orphanage got word that Sarah Joy was going to have her very own family! Look at the difference between the top pictures and the others.  There seem to be several years between them. Actually, we think she was seven in the top picture and thirteen in the bottom pictures. Why the huge gap? When she was seven, it looks as if her file was prepared for foreign adoption (no one within China would be interested in adopting a child with a visible special need, so sad to say). The gap represents all the years that SHE WAITED.

Let me leave you with a more hopeful way of moving past the sadness and into the joy: Although Sarah Joy's adjustment won't be easy by any means, she will not be alone anymore! She will be supported by every member of her family, a family that God Himself gathered together. God has done a miracle in each one of our hearts to tell us that she is one of us, a Smedley! Our hope and prayer is that not only will she enjoy her own family here on earth, but that she will come to know the One who saves anyone who calls on Him, who adopted us into His family. "For you did not receive the spirit of bondage again to fear, but you received the Spirit of adoption, by whom we cry out "Abba, Father." The Spirit Himself bears witness with our spirit that we are CHILDREN OF GOD."

I said it before Max Lucado!

Since we created our blog, Max Lucado has written a devotional book entitled "Safe in the Shepherd's Arms". Hopefully that will bring some traffic to our little blog! I am so thankful that no matter what we go through, we can always depend on and trust God to stay with us and help us through!

That's good to know, since we are heading into a new adventure which requires us to let go and let God. We have found that many people don't understand letting go and letting God - that is a foreign concept, and one that relied on heavenly wisdom and priorities, not conventional human wisdom and norms.

We really thought our family was complete by necessity. Our home is small, our finances are challenged, and our age is, well, we are not spring chickens! But God definitely had other plans for us . . . yep! He has been making changes in our lives to make us ready for this very point, small corrections in the way we do things and even a miracle or two! Maybe I will list them later, as we are in awe now of seeing what He was doing that has now been made plain:

Here's the news . . . we will be bringing home Lizzy's best friend from her orphanage days in China to be our daughter. Her name will be Sarah Joy Smedley! She will turn 14 in August of 2017, so we know we will be in China before that date to prevent her from aging out. The prospects for a special needs orphan in China after he/she turns 14 is very grim. We felt God tugging at our hearts to not let this happen to this child. We cannot save them all, but to the one who gains a family and learns about the love of Christ, it means everything! Next time I will tell you how this came about. Until then, say a prayer for us! Making a decision of this magnitude definitely brings on some turbulence from the evil one!

Catching up after 2 1/2 years!

Oh my! I feel as if a lifetime has passed since I last created a blog post! Two and one-half years ago was my last post. YiLi and I had just met Lizzy Fang Fang. We were still in China, and, shall we say, Fang Fang did not take to me! After we came home, though, she quickly (within a couple of months) became comfortable, and it became clear that she has a sweet and content personality. She was almost 11 at that time, and now she is 13, a teenager! But inside, she is still a sweet little girl. Sam is 10 and YiLi will be 13 in March.

So much has changed! I reduced my hours at work simply to allow for all the surgeries(two) and therapies (weekly or more than weekly) that our children need. My full-time job at a small law firm for an attorney who knew me well from my previous banking career and as organist at church FELL INTO MY LAP back in late 2009. Soon after that, we began our first adoption process. As our family needs changed, my attorney's needs changed right along with us, as he began to gradually, ever so gradually prepare for retirement. Recently we began homeschooling all three children, and I was able to choose the work hours needed to support our family, while being home most of the day for schooling. God is good!

One thing that has stayed the same is our desire to tell our children about the love of Jesus. We believe very firmly that God has blessed our adoption path because of our commitment to riase our kids up in a Christian home in the middle of a world that seems to be turning from Him more and more. So, I will not be changing our blog title, because "Safe in the Shepherd's Arms"  is ever so appropriate!

I think what you really want to see are recent pictures of our family, so let me get right to it! On my next post, though, I will give you some really BIG news, so stay tuned . . .

Our now 13 year old!

One of my faves with Sam and Grandma Grace

So grown up!

One of my absolute favorites!

May 25, 2014, two months home and you can see her personality come through!

At the Ark Encounter, October 2016

My favorite of Fang Fang (in China)

We have our beautiful little girl! We met her Monday, but have not been able to connect. She is everything we have hoped for and more! She prefers to be called " Fang Fang" rather than Lizzy right now. Please pray for her as she is in deep grief at loss of loved ones and country, and I am lonely from being without my mate Rick and being rejected by her, which is not unexpected, as older kids see us as the ones taking them away from all they hold dear. I understand this logically, but it still hurts my heart. But she is wonderful! Her smile, rare now, lights up a room! Her giggle and her love of silliness will fit right in with our family. She is a little spitfire! She has quite a limp going on, but that does not stop this girl!  God be praised that she is ours!

So thankful . . .

Not just an ordinary old truck . . .

Don't you love it when God uses ordinary things in our world to demonstrate His love for us? It's just an old truck . . . for a few days last week we thought it had a blown head gasket, and that it might have been cheaper to replace the whole engine than get to the problem.

There were stages in our reactions. Although we knew God was in charge, we had been asking for confirmation of something big in our lives, and we started out by asking ourselves if this was God saying "no".  Okay, I'll admit it. We doubted! We knew that the fear and confusion we were tempted to feel did not come from God. So we just waited. While we waited, we learned a new appreciation for our truck as the children and I walked to the places we needed to get to.

We thought the truck was "dead" After an entire work week, when I got home on Friday at 5:15 pm, there was a phone message from Sheri at our mechanic's garage that we could come and pick the truck up. Our agreement had been that they would fix the radiator, and by taking it out, Mark would then be able to see if the head gasket was cracked or blown. Then they would call us to decide the next tactic. But this message addressed none of that - just said "Come and get your truck . . ."

We were going to a picnic up in Pleasantville at our friend's house on Saturday. So we waited until then to pick up the truck so that we didn't waste a trip. Oh, the anticipation! It sounded like the truck was totally fixed, but was there a message on the seat?

What would have been previously upsetting (a bill for $600.00) had become a true joy, when we discovered that the gasket was not blown and the truck was good to go.

Here's my spiritual application  and why I am blogging again after so long . . . if we were that GLAD that an old truck we had was thought to be "dead" and was now "alive", how much more glad should we be that Jesus died and is now alive?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! How overjoyed should we be that we were once dead and are now alive in Jesus!!!!!

Often times, we get so bogged down in life's cares that we forget the truth that really matters!! I hope this encourages you in your day to day walk! Look around and see past the cares to some of our hidden blessings on this earth, as well as our promised future with the One who gave His life so that we could also live!  

We appreciate our truck so much now! I call her our "pretty, pretty". It's amazing how God can use something "bad" to correct our attitudes and remind us that everything we have is a blessing from Him!

 

"He is not here, He has risen, just as He said!"  Matthew 28:6

 

"We were therefore buried with Him through baptism into death in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead through the glory of the Father, we too may live a new life!"  Romans 6: 4

 

 

Did you ever think about how big God is?

Did you ever think that a "yes" answer to my prayer often means a "no" answer to someone else's prayer? Take adoption, for instance . . .  One mama's prayer for blessing to adopt a certain little child, if answered, might mean that another mama gets disappointed with the answer she receives. One delay in the timing of a family's approval might mean that God was protecting them from an even bigger glitch or problem down the road. Maybe if that delayed family had travelled when THEY thought they should have, they would have been caught up in a dangerous situation or the SAARS outbreak.

But that's just adoption. Think about all the prayers of all types for all the situations for all the believers who pray, and how everyone's lives intersect here and there behind the scenes. Think about prayer in terms of the entire globe! And then know that:

" My help comes from the Lord who made heaven and earth.
   He will not allow your foot to be moved.
   He Who keeps you will not slumber . . ."     Psalm 121:3

and

"And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose."                               Romans 8:28 

You might think about this subject, like I do, but we cannot totally understand how big God is, how He never makes mistakes, we don't wait because He is "busy" with someone else, we wait for our own good. So, folks, God is behind EVERY prayer situation, answers all of them in the way that is best according to His plan, whether we can see that plan or not, and never makes a mistake or a poor judgment.

What is your mountain you need to climb today? Is there a situation that tempts you to fear or worry? Have you ever tried to "manipulate" an answer to prayer to be the one you want? Got your heart set on something? I do. Let's give our fears, our worries and our desires to God. He knows them already!

"Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ . . ."

Our God loves us, He's BIG, and He's got every prayer request in the whole world under control!!!!
So don't be afraid to add yours! As big

as He is, He also calls us by name and considers us precious!

What a boy will do for his first popsicle . . .

 Does this little man look like he had one root canal, two crowns, four fillings, six extractions and three stiches just hours ago?!!!  What a brave kid! Seriously, though, we are praising God for His watch care and for His timing. We brought him home just in time to protect his adult teeth. I can't help but wonder if he had stayed in China and his mouth started to hurt worse and worse, what could have been done? The surgeon says that with reasonable care from now on that there is no reason his permanent teeth should not be strong and healthy. Yahoo! Only four of his permanent teeth were already in (the 4 in the very back) and they were filled with white fillings that should last a lifetime.
After eating applesauce, two pancakes and some water and juice, he asked to go to school tomorrow . . . ah, no, he's staying home with dad one more day whether he needs to or not!

 These are my birthday candles - one from YiLi and one from Sam. How could I possibly decide which one to burn first, so we have been lighting both of them in the evenings.  Very sweet and romantic!

Ah, spring! I was so very proud of YiLi as she volunteered to allow Sam to take turns with her on HER bike, since he does not yet have his own. Considering that having a little brother join us has been, shall we say, a challenge for YiLi, I believe this is very kind and commendable.  She has the love of Christ shining through her! In her own prayer one night she prayed "Jesus, please help me not to be jealous of Sam forever." We should take lessons from our children . . .

Oh, yes, Sam very much enjoyed his first popsicle. He chose orange.

I am a big boy now!

Today was Sam's 2nd day of kindergarten. He liked today just as much as he liked yesterday! For some reason, I am not able to upload any pictures to my blog. I am hoping to figure this out soon, so that I can show you the pics I shot today of him at his school! Stay tuned . . .

Island pictures

Goodbye Guangzhou . . .

Doxology

OK, I hope you all don't consider this post in poor taste. It is just so funny that I can't stop myself from sharing. Sam has not been feeling well today and has been in the bathroom a lot to the extent that , let's just say poo stinky! Daddy commented that even he could smell it, which he usually cannot. YiLi also said that she could not smell anything, and Daddy retorted that she was lucky. The next thing we knew, YiLi was singing "Praise God from whom all blessings flow, Praise Him all creatures here below, Praise Him above ye heavenly host, praise Father, Son and Holy Ghost." And she meant it! I guess she was really thankful for that blessing!

At any rate, please say a prayer for safe travel for us and for Sam's tummy to feel better.

A delicate balancing act . . .

I've been noticing that I cannot be as verbally and demonstratively loving with Sam as I would want to be, not yet. YiLi knows she is dearly loved, she understands that love grows when shared, and yet, this is a hard process for her to go through. She IS making her way, but I do stop myself from going on and on about:

Sam's sweet heart- when we play Sorry, and someone gets sent home, even if he is the one sending them home, he begins a pitiful fake cry and comes over to that person and kisses and hugs them! The first time he did this, he checked out our response. When he saw we liked it, the kisses and hugs just got bigger and bigger!

How stinking' cute he is!

How clever he is! When he repeats English words for us, he has a peculiar little accent. Even though he is 6, it reminds me of how a baby will mispronounce words in a cute way and how sad it is when that baby starts speaking correctly . . .

How much mischief this little boy can find in this small space. Over and over again we have gotten on google translate, explained our expectations, described what a family is, held hands and gotten a Chinese pinkie promise about what he will or will not do going forward . . . We are making headway, but I would not exactly leave me dearest possessions on the counter for anyone to come along and play with!

Really, YiLi is doing great. We try not to make her responsible for too much translation, but there have been several times when she breaks out in giggles and then tells us what Sam has said, so that is a good sign.

I hope this helps a family heading over for a subsequent adoption, just something to think about.

No blog is complete without a panda . . .

Vicky reminded me that I have not blogged for a few days . . . we have been wrapped up in chasing, guarding, feeding, protecting, feeding, teaching, feeding . . . you get the idea! Yes, we came to Guangzhou on Friday, but we don't have our consulate appointment until Thursday, and we don't leave until just after midnight on Saturday, China time! We are so ready to be home. I am enjoying China, but my impression of the China Hotel still stays true. It is not a good place for us, as there are no restaurants near-by except McDonalds. We have been to several really weird places and received unexpected meals that cost a lot of money. Why can't we walk into any Chinese restaurant and just order some rice or noodles with some ordinary vegetables? No chicken feet, pigs knuckles or duck head, please. My impression of China vs. other countries that I have lived in or spent time in is that most Chinese people are not interested in helping foreigners or speaking English. That said, though, we have many many blessings for which we are thankful:

Sam is unexpectedly healthy! He seems to have no remaining issues from his special needs he had surgeries for. We were told to prepare fro the worst and pray for the best, and we received the best!

He is so cute and can look so sweet and innocent that he "bamboozles" especially women. They just want to give him anything and everything. Men and women, including our guides, laugh at him because he says such unexpected things. Last night he got out of the taxi and swept the hotel greeter's hand off of our taxi and told him that he would take care of things . . . once in Shenyang he raised his arm in the air like he has seen people do and ordered the waiter over to our table . . . people think this is just so cute, but in reality, we have our work cut out for us! He makes fast friends with every bus and taxi driver, invites them out for a dinner and a "beer".

Today YiLi and I were studying on some of her reading homework. He came over and was very interested. So not only is he smart, but he seems to find learning interesting. I hope so, because we want him to start kindergarten in January! I can't quite see Grandma Grace watching him all day for very long. He is a bit sneaky and I think he would get quite a lot past her. Although, maybe she can hold her own!

OK, I know all you want are pictures. I can only post 3-4 at a time. After this blog, I will immediately post just some pictures that don't require words.

More pics

Where did the panda go?

Orphanage visit

I am simply going to post some pictures because I do not have time to express my feelings about this day now:

The lady in the gold shirt is Sam's foster mom during the school week. Within the orphanage there are apartments set up like a "pseudo family" for four children with two "parents". When I get back to the US I can post many, many pics, but right now I am limited. Sam shared his bedroom with a third grade boy. Then on the weekends, remember, Sam went to the lovely home of a retired general and his wife. It turns out he has probably, no definitely, taken more vacations than I have!

Many had requested that I check into some of the children remaining at the orphanage. We were not given any info directly, except that the boy pictured on this post is available. But I am encouraged to keep in touch with the orphanage via email, and can make specific requests in that manner. So I think that it fairly good news, and I can coordinate with the advocates back home to see who I should inquire about.